heartbeat.

i haven't blogged in awhile. too busy.

i'm very confused. don't know what to think.

can you feel my heartbeat? the heart that you've stomped on is still beating and even so towards you. no matter how hard i try, no matter how many new people i meet. and again and again. why must i turn around and think of you? i'm going to stop, i want to stop. though i calm myself again, it's no use. my heart is broken, why? why am i still doing these stupid things, my mind seems to understand. but why must my heart still act on its own? i grabbed you and i still can't let you go. it still seems like you're by my side, i can't believe in goodbyes. no matter who meet, i can't open a part of my heart, and i keep leaving a space for you. there's no reason for you to come back. but my heart keeps believing you will. why won't it listen? listen to my heartbeat. it's beating for you.

seriously? back to square one.